Is x == x being false really any more surprising than x + 1  == x being true?

Yes, a lot more.  Equality is a symmetric relation.  So "x equals x" is true for every x.  A logic/language in which that is not true is unsound.

x + 1 == x is just an equation.  Coming up with a theory where it holds is straightforward.  For example, addition followed by the "fractional part" operation, on the set [0,1].